i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize