You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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