I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is it with giant penises always finding me
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
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