Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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