last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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