I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I'm always down for nudity.
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