I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tied me up with her honor cords...
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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