I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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