Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize