Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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