I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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