Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
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