Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He? As in you personified your dick?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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