I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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