my vag is so smooth its legendary
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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