I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
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