Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
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