Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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