If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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