oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
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They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
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I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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