so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize