Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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