you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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