ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize