i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
so let's talk penis.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
so much tequila, so little girl.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize