If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize