if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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