i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
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I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
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5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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