the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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