I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
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I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
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Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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