We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
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