I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize