sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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