Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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