That's intense
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
You ate ashes out of my bong
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize