Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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