im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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