He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
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She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
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Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
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