His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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