shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize