I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
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