It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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