I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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