My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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