got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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