apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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