I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize