sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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