It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize