is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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